Where Do You Stand As A Couple?

 

Ever wonder, what it takes to get the two of you together?

 

If you're trying to get your partner to make a commitment, there's good news and bad news.

 

The good news is that you can stop trying to sweet-talk, manipulate, or pressure him into proposing. The bad news is that there's nothing you can do to speed up the process. People fall in love and get married every day.

 

But men have their own biological clocks. When they're ready, they head down the aisle -- but not a moment sooner.

 

In order to help you figure this out, there are 8 subtle, sacred moments that can catapult your relationship to the next level. Read -- and look out for the signs!

 

 

 

Get Real

Often we tolerate aspects of our relationship or partner, because the foundation seems too risky to crack. But once things feel more stable, it’s time to get real. The next time you let your guard down and being more open is going to allow you to get closer. When you start getting real, in a relationship. It’s kind of a relief.

 

This reveals your true level of intimacy. It means that things have moved from the fantasy of courtship to a real relationship, warts and all. Being more honest is a step in the right direction of an authentic relationship.

 

 

 

 

Introducting Each Other

Up until this point you haven’t known exactly what to call each other, when you’ll subject him to your besties. You know the game has shifted, once you start calling him your boyfriend, or being labeled as his girlfriend.

 

Having the pride to give what you two have going on a name, is another level of intimacy. Once you both say those words out loud, this makes it real. This is one way to learn that you are a solid item with your partner. It’s an excellent way to go deeper into the next phase of your love bond.

 



 Meet The Family

Another part of it, is expect him to take you for whatever the event is. The bottom line is that he’s introducing you to his family and showing you where he comes from.

Sometimes meeting the family provides feedback about the person you’re dating. You may see characteristics about him being expressed you never saw before. How we are with our biological families can speak volumes about how a person really thinks, feels and behaves.

Sometimes these visits are the key to unlocking greater love and intimacy. Or they can backfire and send you packing.

 

Silence Is Golden

In real life, it’s the smaller moments - the comfortable silence. You can actually relax and just be with each other…which then allows you to access a whole other layer of intimacy. When you share a moment like this, you’re now receiving -- and accepting -- the trueness and longevity of your connection.

It’s probably the biggest way a couple knows they are just naturally, effortlessly…together. Instead of thinking up a topic for discussion, you realize that it’s okay to just be  ‘you’. Is what signifies the seriousness of a relationship.

You’re not concerned with filling up the silences with words to try and prove to yourself that you are connected. That comfortable silence is significant, because it demonstrates that you have security in your relationship.

Attending A Wedding Together

An equally important milestone, if he's getting up the guts to ask you to accompany him to a friend’s wedding. This is likely a coming out party for your relationship. It announces that he’s serious -- about Bringing up heavy topics like marriage and forever-ness.

 

The sheer emotionality of attending a wedding can provoke a deep emotional response. Ceremonies can evoke spiritual connections. Plus, watching people you care about take vows can turn into an emotional moment for the two of you.

 

Often couples in the dating mode find that it  ‘triggers’ a reaction of ‘where does that leave us’? Be aware of the feelings that surface and use them for learning more about your own relationship.

 

 

 

That Blowout Fight

It’s unrealistic to think you’ll never have a blowout fight, if you’re going to be with someone for a long time. It shows you’re in touch with reality, and that you are willing to communicate and listen to each other, and do the work to get through it.

All couples have fights, even nasty ones that include hurtful words, threats and objects thrown on. But the type of fight that happens, is usually the kind that calls your entire relationship into question -- and makes the two of you think long and hard as to whether you should put in the effort or call it quits.

Working through a big blowout fight can show that you both are choosing to stay together and are willing to address any issues that arise. This will be a ‘true test’.

Facing Tragedy Together

Facing a tragedy as a couple allows you to experience a greater appreciation of what you have together. It allows you to observe how you’ll each be there for one another in a profound and compassionate way during hard times.

When you’ve been together for years, you’re bound to face some type of tragedy, such as a death or difficult situation. But now, you’ve been together long enough to really lean on each other.

If you make it through each other’s expectations, you’ll know you can get through almost anything with your partner by your side.

He’s Part Of You

The time before the years you’ve now been together doesn’t seem to exist and all your best memories include him. You suddenly feel like he is  ‘you’. This is the moment you become aware that your guy is someone that you ‘chose’.

 

It’s a big step forward when you realize, that it’s not about the family you were born into or raised with. But about the family you two are creating and have chosen.

PS : If you’re not secure and confident enough to know in your heart, what you need and want in a relationship, and are asking others their advice. Then, you should rethink things.

The fact that you’re asking outsiders what they think, is a sign in itself that you may know the real truth about it, but are looking for reassurance about the decision you know you need to make. That's not to say it'll never happen.

In the meantime, it's not possible to convince a commitment-phobic person, that you're the best thing that will ever happen to them. Even if you are! Instead, your best bet is looking for someone who doesn't need convincing.

 

 

 

Are My Friends Getting In The Way Of My Life & Relationship?

 

 

Good friends can be part of the best medicine for our mental well-being. Studies show that social connection has the power to heal us from depression and lessen the severity of illness. Friends you can't trust. Does this sound familiar? We all do have one or two "friends" who drag us down instead of make us feel better. If so, you may be in a toxic friendship—and you're not alone.

According to experts, most Americans have struggled with at least one unhealthy social bond by the time they're in their late teens. Sadly, many continue to endure these connections throughout their lives. Friendships can be so potent, however, they can intrude and erode our intimate relationships. A healthy friendship is one in which you can have contact with different people without worrying about negative consequences.

Fortunately, you can break the cycle. The first step is by simply spotting the signs. If you have someone in your life who’s taking more than they’re giving. It might be time, to go your separate ways.


THE GOSSIPER

Can be a destructive force in your life, as this person calls your own integrity into question. They talk about everyone, there's a good chance that they're also gossiping about you behind your back. Without this type of person in your life, you can grow stronger in your feelings of self-worth.


THE CRITICS

Makes you feel bad about yourself. From your clothes, your relationship and your life. Most of us are pretty critical of ourselves. When you consistently allow someone to make you feel badly about yourself, you turn a great deal of mental power over to them.


THE JUDGEMENTAL

These people gives unsolicited advice, even though you’ve politely asked them to stop. They wants to give you a life sentence of insecurity without parole. Too much time spent in their company, will make you doubt every decision you’ve made. Find a friend who’s cool with letting you make your own choices, even if they do disagrees with it.


THE PITIER

Who tries to help you in various areas of your life. There’s always friends who is forever trying to fix your life. They can lead to a belief that you are not self-reliant or independent. They mean well, but seriously… buzz off!


THE SCHEMER

From asking you to help them or involving you in their hidden agendas schemes. They always trying to make you an accomplice to their shady plans. You might want to spend your time with someone who has more lofty goals and aspirations! It sounds like this person only wants a sidekick who will take the fall with them. Of course, you have better things to do with your time.


THE UGLY BITTER

Obviously, these people are bad for your health. Everything is negative in their life and spending time with them makes you feel like life sucks. Life’s too short for this type of attitude. It’s time to break up!


THE OLD BUDDIES

It’s great to have friends from your past, but if that is all you have to connect on. Then you’re not moving forward with your lives or making new memories. Live in the present and spend time with people you would like to make new memories with.


THE ALL-TIME BROKE BUDDY

Get rid of those who don’t pay their way. Whether it’s a friend always asking you for a loans and never paying you back or who expects you to pay for their life. Remember you are a person and not an ATM.


THE FRIEND @ ENEMY

They your friend, but also your arch enemy. You deserve friendships in which you support each other’s triumphs as opposed to bringing each other down. In reality, supporting each other makes us feel much better about ourselves and our friends.


THE NEGATIVE CREEP

Sometimes a bad influence can be fun, but this person just brings out the worst in you. When you only have one thing in common with a friend, and that one thing is not very healthy. It’s time to ask yourself : Does this person raise me up or bring me down?


THE FACEBOOK FRIENDS

Facebook is a fun pastime. Just be sure, not to let those online friends take the place of real life ones. You are better off having a few true friends that you can confide in rather than a bunch of Facebook friends you barely know. Your true friends will stand by you when you really need them. Your Facebook friends may simply just log out!


THE WHO NEEDS PARTNER WHEN YOU HAVE ME CLUB

These friends are often over-involved in your life. Usually, you can sense how to interpret their silence or when to heed their advice. Danger lies, however, when you find yourself overvaluing a friend who speaks both too frankly and negatively about your intimate relationship.

Often these too attached friends sense that you might be going through hard times with your partner, and they pull you into their lives and ways of thinking. The mildest form of their agenda is for you to complete and fill their lives. The worst agenda is to erode your intimate relationship and happiness and become a member of their Club.

 

Pay Attention To These Warning Signs That You Might Have Fallen Under The Spell Of A Friend With An Agenda When These Kinds Of Friends :

 

• Take up too much of your time and energy.
• Make you feel guilty for not "being there for them.
• Are negative about your partner.
• Increase your unhappiness with your partner.
• Create arguments between you and your partner.

• Your Positives Are Their Negatives. They never congratulate you, instead they use your happy moment as an opportunity to bring you down.

 

• Their World Is Always Worse Than Yours. Whenever you have a problem or dilemma, the toxic friends feels the need to turn it around and show how much worse their life is.

 

• The Other People In Your Life, Don't Want To Be Around Them.If your other friends or family refuse to be in someone's presence.  This should be a red flag that something is very wrong. People who are outside of a situation can often see things that those inside cannot.

 

People experience emotions on a very visceral level, taking in their surroundings and feeding off others energy. It’s more effective emotionally for you to have people in your life who exude positive energy, rather than those who can drain you of the vital life energy you needs to maintain your own quality of life.

By cutting this person out of your life, you can move past old feelings and emotional attachments and in turn open your heart and mind to new experiences, friendships and relationships.

Seek out friends who support you and you’ll be a whole lot happier in all aspects of your life. Good lucks !!!

 

 

  

 

How Did Bad Boys Bring Out The Best (Beast) In Women ?

  



Bad Boys studies women with passion and dedication. Bad Boys surely don't sound that good, rite! But believe me, these types of men can get your blood boiling. Get you all stimulating hot, sexy and excited. Thus, bring out the spirit in your body.

 

Just like every woman has a spicy side, every man has a bit of the devil in him too. Unsure whether you're with a Bad Boys or not ? Bad Boys uses three tricks with their female friends or girlfriend alike to keep things interesting.

 

Here are their strategies, see if any of them looks or sounds familiar.

 

 

 

• Bad Boys Tell You, " You're Beautiful... "

 

 

Women always love compliments. So when a woman is relishing, a compliment. She's suddenly available and open-minded.

 

It's not easy being original with women these days, especially when it comes to pick-up lines. Men skilled at the art of introduction, know these first few moments are crucial. Bad Boys knew women don't like pick-up lines. It MAKES them feel run-of-the-mill. Women prefer personalization.

 

Bad Boys personalized their message to make you believe that they're telling the truth. They are keenly aware that a woman's instinct is strong. So if she senses bullshit, she will put up the wall back up.

 

Bad Boys talk to you straight. They know that you've heard all the crap before, and realize that the best way to your heart and to your bed is by being refreshingly candid. That's why, they sound original.

 

 

 

 

Every woman is unique in and of herself, and Bad Boys pay extra attention to noticing every curve and every mannerism. They rarely go for the obvious compliment. Instead, they praise you for your dimple / the cute way you laughs etc.

 

Bad Boys compliment a woman on how beautiful she is in a way that is special to her. They treat a woman special by the way in which they do things for and with her. They might do something totally unexpected.

 

A lot of men don't realize that the more beautiful a girl feels, the more easy-going she is. Bad Boys love making women feel beautiful just for the sake of making them feel beautiful. They strive to enter your planet and make you feel good. It's an ego boost for Bad Boys to have that power.

 

A woman's desire to feel good about herself is equivalent to a man's desire to have sex. It's that strong, and you know it. Both men and women want to be in control, and having the right lines is an important step in that direction.

 

 

 

• Bad Boys Encourage Naughtiness.

Bad Boys never judge you on what you've done in the past. Coz no matter what the scenario, they cast no stones!!

 

 Bad Boys encourage the girl they're with to open up about fantasies. They believe that a woman wants to be as naughty as men. However, society says that a woman shouldn't let go. So she needs an excuse to be naughty, while a man just needs a place. It's the man job to give her whatever excuse she needs to let herself go.

 

Bad Boys have fun with mild form of talking dirty and playing games. Humor and charm are the best two elixir when it comes to putting those stupid rules to rest. When the angst is gone, you much more opt to be free to let your hair down and don't care about what people thinks. You can safely be your naughty self.

 

By keeping things light and fun, Bad Boys created an environment that is safe. That's their goal. They want you to feel happy and safe enough to take your shoe off and jump around. Now you're getting somewhere...

For sure, Bad Boys never kiss and tell and that's 90 percent of the fun is the secrets. It is important for a woman to feel safe, feeling naughty. And it's the guy job to create that safe environment. Women are just as bad as Bad Boys are, but society labels you when you express your thoughts.

In the bedroom, you should feel safe and open. The decison is a very personal one, and it's not appropriate for me to tell you exactly when to do it...

 

• Bad Boys Occasionally Fight.

Bad boys will often intentionally press a woman's button to see what she's made of. They do it because they're bored, to try to get a woman to open up, or see how clever she is. They learn a lot of a person from how she behaves when she's angry.

 

Fighting about benign topics is a form of entertainment for them. Men and woman do the same thing to each other, with each forcing the other to survive through series of relationship tests.

 

In most relationships, the female test the male to see if he's alpha enough, yet still sensitive to her needs. The guys who ignores the emotional signal is a goner.
 

 

 

 

However, Bad Boys will sometimes turn the tables and test you. They've become so skilled at winning women. So they're looking for a challenge. People are much more likely to show their true colors when pissed off. Bad Boys want a fast way to see where your strengths and weakness lie.

Passion and anger are right next to each other on the emotional scale. Most Bad Boys - when they trying to heat things up sexually. They will use whatever strategies that are necessary to get someone to speak from the heart and act uninhibited.

This sometimes causes you to shriek at them in frustration. But by letting go of those emotions out is good thing. Think about it, day-to-day living can become monotorious. We wake up and go through our days, and things can get simply boring. Bad Boys always liked stirring things up a bit which in turn stirs you too.

On occasion, Bad Boys pick a fight simply to ensure that the makeup sex will be rough and ready. Makeup sex is a cliche and it's a cliche for a reason. It works! In which you would damn love it. Believe me..

In the end, all comes down to the fact that lust and passion. I mean beauty, naughtiness, and fights - make both men and women feel really and truly alive. And encouraging this behaviour is one of the major talents of Bad Boys.

So are you up to that challenge! You simply either love them or hate them.

Opss.. so I'm not really sorry to say that..

 

 



 

 

Sexuality Individuals : Know Her Female Libido

 

Ever feel like your libidos are stuck in separate lanes? The fact that your sex drives don’t seem to be on the same page may simply be a matter of different sexual personalities. Know your partner’s sex style and in which ways it is similar to yours or opposite. Find her libido type and match it with yours.

 

 

1) If She’s A Sensualist...

 

She uses sex to express her love. To put it bluntly : She doesn’t have sex, she makes love. She’s a hopeless romantic angel that craves lots of eye contact, deep kissing, foreplay and post-coital cuddling.

 

In order to truly arouse her, you have to go for quality, not quantity. If you’re not really in the mood to be creative, romantically speaking, go for the basic moves. But couch them in a dare, tell her you want to climax simultaneously during missionary. So that she gets the feeling that it's boundary pushing.

 

From time to time, go for a quickie. In her eyes, having a quickie means you’re so attracted to her that you can’t wait. You want her right then and there. A quickie will offer the physical connection she craves with more urgent kisses and touching, minus the drawn-out pomp and circumstance.

 

A few affirming words will turn the passion button on and set the pace. Non-verbal mimicry also works. Match her movements, so she can better understand how turned on you are.

 

 

2) If She’s An Adventurer…

 

She measures her pleasure by sexual enthusiasm and variety, in positions and changes of scenery. She needs a partner in crime who is not afraid to try everything. She believes that if the sex isn’t the point, neither is the relationship.

 

Therefore, given the fact that she uses sex to express her love, try some role-play. It will please both your palates. It indulges her inner risk taker, and you’re also connecting emotionally.

 

Learning to say erotic words in a foreign language, mutual masturbation, even seeing how long you can drive each other mad, doing everything but the main event.

 

 

 

 

3) If She’s A Pleaser…

 

She gets off most by controlling the action and gratifying her partner. Even if it means putting her own needs on the back burner. She’s able to lower her inhibitions because she feels a rush from seeing your pleasure and the way you react to her moves.

 

Plumb your sexual potential by keeping the lights on during sex. Seeing and being seen means, get you the full-on eye contact you crave. Be careful though, being generous in bed is one thing. Because she has a tough time letting go and fully surrender herself to her own pleasure as well is another.

 

What you have to do is treat her with arousing touches, during foreplay, move slowly. Indulge her need to be touched by rubbing her scalp, her feet, and massaging her back. As for during the act 69: She’ll enjoy the fact that she’s pleasing you with oral and you can return the favor in the same time.

 

4) If She’s A Thinker…

 

She loves to fantasize, but often stress either about her her body or performance. Sometimes torpedoes her libido, so she needs reassurance. If you notice that she’s consistently shooing you away because she’s feeling blah..., try arousing her by subtly tapping in to things that have turned her on in the past and then let nature take it course.

 

Her innate anxiety will soon be a matter of the past as well. You can also quiet the naysayer in her head by milking the atmosphere to get her into the right frame of mind.

 

Unwind with a simple ritual. Give her a massage with steamy towels. This helps her relax and rediscover how amazing her body can feel.

 

 

 

Sexual Individuality : Know Your Male Libido

 

 

We’re all different in so many aspects, why would things be different when it comes to sex? In order to learn one person’s sexual individuality, the simpler form of your bed DNA. You must find out what type of libido you have and how to pair it with your partner’s.

Know that perfect sexual compatibility is rare, so try and make the best of the situation you are in, without dreaming of impossible standards, which will leave you both unsatisfied.

Here’s The List That Will Help You Clear Things Out And Find Out Which Libido You Possess :

 

The Disinterested Libido

There are persons that have naturally low libidos. They practically have no physical or emotional problem with having sex, they just seem to not be in the mood.

If you’re one of those, you might develop feelings of guilt and defensiveness because you’re not able to satisfy your partner. However, you must accept that you have not chosen to be a disinterested libido type. Is that you wish, you did feel like sex and enjoy it as other people seem to.

The Detached Libido

The detached libido type usually feels sexual desire but is too preoccupied with other life issues to seek out couple sex, usually masturbating to relieve sexual frustrations because it is the simpler solution.

Being overwhelmed by stress from financial or work pressure, you might think that sex is the last thing on your list right now. But be aware, that this attitude does more wrong than good.

The Stressed Libido

You’re always on your toes, constantly worrying about your performance and about whether what you are doing is pleasurable or not. You tend to avoid having sex for fear of failure, even though you might still be very aroused.

You’re a fan of masturbation, because in these moments the pressure is off and you can enjoy the pleasure wholeheartedly.

The Dependent Libido

You need sex to cope with problems. Sex soothes you and makes you feel better. You probably masturbated a lot in your teenage years. Mainly to better deal with bad feelings such as stress, boredom or anxiety.

If your partner doesn’t want to do it, when you want because your too emotional state. You tend to interpret it, as a lack of love and caring. It’s like she’s refusing to give you the medicine you need to… feel better.

The Reactive Libido

You care more about the sexual needs of your partner. You might even end up ignoring your own desires, if you feel they aren’t what your partner usually enjoys. You put a lot of effort into foreplay and can only orgasm, once you make sure she did.

If your partner is not in the mood, you’d rather masturbate than impose your own sexual needs.

The Addictive Libido

 

Your problem is that you can’t seem to resist the lure of having sex outside your relationship. It’s not that you don’t love your partner. It’s that you’re constantly craving more. You think that couple sex is boring, compared to the dangerous allure of doing it with a complete stranger.

 

Like any addiction, it’s the behavior that controls you rather than vice versa. Although you might feel bad when cheating, you just can’t stop doing it. Some therapy sessions and counseling are in need here.

 

The Erotic Libido

 

You want sex to be intense and passionate, at least some of the times. You can cope with periods of ordinary sex. Provided there are regular opportunities for adventurous and sizzling sex.

 

If you have a strong erotic libido, you get little or no pleasure from low key sex. This might cause problems in your relationship, because your partner might start to feel a pressure to perform at great heights all of the time, which is never good.

 

The Compulsive Libido

 

While the Erotic Libido wants to explore all the wondrous variety of sexual activities that are now openly discussed in our society. The compulsive lover has one main sexual object or situation that triggers sexual arousal.

 

Some sexual compulsions can be incorporated into a sexual relationship, but others, such as the compulsive use of Internet pornography, excludes a partner.

 

Extreme compulsive libido types can only arouse using the sexual object or ritual. Which creates a lot of damage inside the relationship, because a unilateral position in this area is bound to lead to frustrations from the opposite part.

 

The Entitled Libido

 

You assume that it’s you, given the right to get whatever you want in your sexual relationship. If you want hot steamy sex, you should be given the opportunity to have hot steamy sex. If, on the contrary, you want cuddling, your partner should provide you with just that.

 

You are very influenced by the idealization of sex in movies and books and think that you are entitled to have the same great sex they’re having on screen. Because you’re you. And you’re that Special.

 

The Sensual Libido

 

Sex is an important part of the relationship for you, and you want both you and your partner to enjoy the benefits of orgasmic pleasure. To manage this, you make sure you satisfy all of your partner’s desires. But you want equal time in getting your wants and needs met, and aren’t afraid of letting your partner know what you find pleasurable.

 

However, this doesn’t mean that you have sex for the sake of, well, sex. You care more about the emotional connections that becomes stronger between the two of you each time you reach another level of sensual euphoria.

 

You can psyche yourself out of revealing your secret desires all you want, but the truth of the matter is that we all like sex! There is just no getting around it. We may have different physical and emotional blockages that stop us from fully enjoying our bodies and the body of our partner, but when it comes right down to it we are all sexual beings.

 

Ignoring that or convincing yourself that you are somehow strange or unique because of your fantasies will only lead to isolation and resentment. Sex is a normal, incredible, comforting, healing, stress-relieving, bonding good time!

 

Managing Emotional And Physical Space In A Relationship

Managing Space In Relationships

All intimate relationships must navigate the continuum of both together/apart and mine/yours/ours. Many of us may have made great love choices, yet haven't come to a happy arrangement with problem-solving abilities.

The "relationship rhythm range" of time alone and time as one that mesh with yours—two things that are necessary to resolve emotional and physical space issues. Here is a guide to help you understand and improve how you and your partner can deal with these on-going responsibilities.

Emotional Space Issues

Time together is space together. When you fall in love, you tend to spend the beginning of your relationship doing many shared activities. As you ease into the everyday romance of love, you tend to spend less of your time jointly.

With the demands of careers, family, interests and social obligations. these might keep you apart longer than you wanted or expected. If one of you is unhappy with these "relationship rhythms.

Try These Steps :

1.) Hold up an imaginary mirror and imagine you are looking into it.

* Now think first about how you would like your partner to speak to you and the tone would you like to use.

* Be ready to use, the "Ask and Tell" technique. If you tell your partner what's bothering you, as well as, ask when you sense something is wrong with him or her. Then you'll shorten the length of your unhappiness time.

* Now tell or ask your partner about the issue-and be sure to use the kind of words and tone you imagined in step one.

2.) Give a number. Signal your partner the degree of seriousness of your discontent by supplying a number from one to ten, with ten the highest.

• Describe your feelings with adjectives about only yourself. ( I feel lonely, left out, bored, disconnected, resentful, jealous, forgotten, etc.)

  

Take an "educated guess" as to why you feel this way. Dig back into your family life when you were a child and find out what's your "hot buttons".

• You might find, for instance, that you are not so comfortable spending lots of time together with your partner because the turmoil in your early family life, made you feel like hiding out in your bedroom. Retreating became your "emotional default drive."

• Or, perhaps old problems from a previous relationship-gone-wrong are getting activated. You might discover that you hate staying home on weekend nights ever since you and your previous partner always fought about not going out.

  

3.) Turn that imaginary mirror, so it faces your partner. Imagine what your partner would say are the reasons for the two of you being too much apart or together lately. Jot down some ideas from his or her point of view.


Think about your partner's "hot buttons" and "emotional default drives." Talk out loud to your partner what you think is his or her explanation.

• Pretend, you are actually your partner speaking. ( I've been very pre-occupied lately with work, I'm just under a lot of stress andI didn't want to bother you. At night I'm so exhausted and feel so shaky that I just don't feel like making love, etc. ) You probably feel burned out with it. Thanks, yourself for listening!

4.) Ask your partner to take your viewpoint. Speak as though he or she were you. Now see what solutions you two can design.

* You might plan a "date" night together. Or, you might each want to take a "girls/boys night out."

5.) Sit down with a calendar. Chart upcoming events, holidays, obligations and stress points. Talk out what's on the schedule for the next one or two months.

• Mark with the letter "T" activities that can be done together. Mark with the letter "A" those that can or need to be done alone.

Step back and see what you're your "relationship rhythm range" looks like. Make changes that are mutually satisfying and repeat the above steps as often as necessary.


Physical Space Issues


The use of physical space in your home often plays out as emotional space. For instance, if you like to spend time in the extra bedroom drawing or in your bedroom watching your favorite television show. Then you are simultaneously enacting an emotional space issue of alone time.

 

 

Similarly, if you've set up your living space so that there are no private places for each of you to use. Then you've overlooked the importance of creating emotional alone time. But you can get creative in how you can use your existing space to accommodate everyone's physical space needs.

 

 

Here Are Some Tips :

 

 

1.) Each partner makes a list of the top physical spaces, he or she needs. For instance, A study room, an exercise area, aplace to practice your guitar. Now, tell your partner what you need.

• You don't have to use a room for its intended purpose. Living rooms and big dining tables are often rarely used.

2.) Each partner now makes a list of where in your home you could "squeeze in, some room for your activity.

Now make a list for your partner of where else you think he or she might "squeeze in" some room.

• Typical spaces are in bedrooms, guest rooms, basements, garages or living and dining rooms.

3.) Compare your lists. On a scale of one to ten, with ten the highest. Tell your partner how important this physical space is to you.


4.) Now make a list of what you see are the emotional obstacles. To these "squeezes" and discuss them, including tentative solutions.

•  Perhaps, for example, you are a perfectionist and you don't want a messy dining room table with your partner's work all strewn on it. One solution is to buy a decorative screen to hide the table. Or, maybe a treadmill in your bedroom drives you nuts.

 

 

5.) Ask yourself why you are being so rigid or emotional. How flexible are you and can you both "sacrifice" to make each of you happier? Where you take your partner's viewpoint, in explaining why this space is so important. Again, see what solutions you brainstorm together.

 

 

Finally, remember, healthy couples are flexible, creative problem-solvers who work to balance the needs of both.

Should You Care About Your Partner's Sexual Past ?

First off, ask yourself why should you care so much about what's in the past. You may have caught yourself speculating about your partner's former flames and wondering whether they've enjoyed the same intimacy that the two of you do now.

More often then not, when a person cares to find out about a partner's sexual past. There is some anxiety and concern on their part about the current relationship.

Somewhere, there may even be that lingering worry as to whether you can keep things hot between the two of you. You may just need some soothing from your partner, and to know that your partner is not judging or comparing you to a previous relationship.


Validate Your Feelings Of Needing To Know.

It is okay to have curiosity about it and perfectly normal to want to explore the issue. At some point, when you are starting to get more serious with someone. The conversation about past relationships is bound to occur.

You may feel that learning about your significant other's previous sexual relationships, offers a pretty good clue as to how the current one will progress. So go ahead, have the conversation, and ask the questions: What did you feel was right about the relationship?


Talking Things Out Can Be Helpful And Insightful.

Of course, it's also possible to obsess to the point where it's unhealthy for your current relationship. If you're constantly looking on and searching for information about your partner's ex or exes, to see if they are still in contact with your partner. Now you need to rethink your motives for knowing. If you are obsessed with knowing, it makes sense to step back and ask yourself why. You obviously don't want this to take up too much space in your relationship.

Getting Past History

The key to a vivid sexual relationship is to be in the here and now. Focus on what you have in the moment, not on memories. You will find the reassurance you are looking for in the present, not by comparing yourself to past relationships.


When You And Your Partner Discuss Your Sexual Pasts.

It's important to be open with each other. You both need to agree to be the other's source of primary intimacy. If your partner keeps turning to an ex for emotional support, then you won't have the opportunity to extend it yourself. In this situation, the relationship may not be all that satisfying because the person is not giving it the proper shots.

Remind Yourself.

That there's always a reason, your partner's not with an ex. It's easy to be concerned that they won't measure up to a previous relationship and that in some way you will be held in comparison to this idealized other. It is important to keep in mind that your partner is not in that other pattern with that other partner, but with you.


Be Patient.

Just as trust doesn't develop overnight, neither does a satisfying level of intimacy. It takes both time and effort to build an emotionally and physically intimate relationship.

 

Ladies...10 Intimate Secrets You Should Knew

Have a couple of glasses of wine, start Googling and see what turns you both on, or find something you can learn to take some sex notes. Your guy may never come out and say it, but chances are your special someone wishes you knew certain things that would make him feel more special, sexy, and confident about your relationship.

Just because he won't tell you himself doesn't mean, you should ignored them. Allow yourself to experiment and figure out what he's into :

1. Buy And Wear Sexy Lingerie

For a special occasion or an unexpected surprise, but keep it simple. You have no idea how happy that makes a guy. He'll work harder to make you happy and satisfied.

2. Dress Up And Wear A Pretty Scent.

Guys like it when you smell and look great. Unfortunately, we often times only dress up when we go out because of who is going to see us. Dress up especially for your guy. "Go the distance to look good."

3. Introduce Some New Ideas Into Your Sexual Relationship.

Novelty and newness are important to both passionate love and sexuality for men. The burning desire you both felt when first dating hasn’t been extinguished, you just need to find new ways to stroke the fire and rekindle the flame. You can make sex feel new and naughty. Get creative and go for it!

4. Making Your Own Sex Toys And Erotic Accessories.

Do pick up some bottles of scented massage oils and a book on massage tips, scented candles, cook delicious dinners/desserts. It’s time to get a bit more creative and come of with brand new ways to surprise and excite your guy in and out of bedroom.

5. Touch Him.

Even if you've been together for years, allow yourself to use casual touch in your day-to-day interactions with your guy. Guys still love it when you caress them, brush his hair, touch his chin, hold his hand, stroke his arm, and kiss him. All humans require affectionate touch and it is a necessary aspect of an intimate relationship creating a stronger sense of closeness and emotional connection.

6. Develop Sex Signals.

Some couples have their own personal ways of telling each other, they're interested in having sex. Touch yourself while you catch your guy, gaze across the room. Give him a mischievous wink. Lick or bite your lip ever so slightly. Develop a signal to tell him, you're on. So don’t be shy to capitalize on these cues. Use that creative force to make something beautiful and then go and make some love!

7. Talk About Sex, In And Out Of The Bedroom.

Spend time exploring your boundaries to nurture and expand the intimacy that you share with your partner. In order to connect with your partner on a deeper level, you have to get in harmony on this aspect as well. Talk about your boundaries. Work through your issues. Stretch your understanding of each other and learn to negotiate. This allow you to experience something different and novel, to shock your system into feeling something new and interesting...

8. Ask Him To Describe His Sexual Fantasies To You.

Be vocal and Speak up! . Talk about your fantasies and encourage him to explore his in depth, not just those which are explicitly sexual, but all his dreams and desires. Sex life is about sharing something erotic with your lover! Because everyone's fantasy is different, it's tough to get specific. Hearing these devious acts put into actual words can be a major turn-on.

9. Initiate Sex.

Use the element of surprise and woo him once in awhile. It also gives him, your partner who normally pursues sex, an extra ego boost to feel attractive and wanted.

10. Indulge Him, Because He's Really A Softy.

Remember, guys aren't tough cookies. Once in awhile, when he's feeling down, you need to put the Band Aid on for your man. You can suggest a deeper and more relaxing erotic massage to help him relax. Do whatever you can, but don’t overdo it. Whisper sweet nothings into his ear, as you rub him down. He’ll appreciate this massage, since it’s both arousing and healthy.

Ps : Tease your man, right and you’ll have him begging for more. He’ll love them-- it’s really a win-win....."   ;)