Tuesday, January 31, 2012

12 Tips for Making Long Distance Relationships Work



Long distance relationships are not for the faint of heart. You’ll need to look inside yourself and be sure that you’re ready to deal with this level of commitment. As anyone who has ever been in love with someone who is more than a quick trip away will tell you, long distance relationships suck.

Just like any proximal relationship, they require dedication, communication, patience, trust, and of course, compatibility. But in today’s globalized and high tech world where we work, study and play in different countries, cities and states.


Long distance relationships are more and more common and couples everywhere are able to maintain healthy relationships long distance. There are a host of factors to consider when embarking upon long-distance relationships.

If you are currently in an international long distance relationship, here are 12 tips to help your relationship survive.


 1. Set Rules
Worried about being a nag if you "set rules" for your relationship? Think again. A study that claims 70% of Long Distance Relationship couples who don’t set rules end their relationship within six months. Be realistic in your assessment of this relationship timetable.

2. Make A Goal

3. Talk About It Beforehand

Ask the important questions, like whether or not they’d be willing to relocate if the relationship grows more serious. Although it may seem awkward, it’s best to also set the ground rules for whether or not you’ll be dating exclusively.
4. Don’t Be Controlling
This will just drive your partner away. Being in a long distance relationship requires extreme trust, and it can take time to build. Trying to rush through an experience, even for a relationship, is a good way to build up unhealthy levels of stress.


5. Raise Your Trust Level
Again, it takes a lot of trust to maintain a successful Long Distance Relationship. When living a great deal of your lives away from each other in a long distance relationship, it’s natural that you may start hearing about some of your partner’s new friends — don’t be overly paranoid and suspicious. Do keep your eyes open, but don’t be naive.
6. Communicate Daily

This is extremely important! The quality and quantity of communication with partner will need to increase substantially when you embark on long-distance relationships. Try closing the gap with video chat such as Skype.com or TokBox.com.or Call one another at least every two days, and feel free to text, email, and tweet to fill the voids.


7. Be Positive

Have hope ! Don’t focus on the negative aspects of your long distance relationship, because, let’s face it: They’re not always fun. It’ll make things worse. Use the time apart to grow personally — explore your hobbies and and interests. Exude positive energy to keep your partner’s spirits up, too. It’s all about weighing the ups and downs associated with what you want from your life.
8. Care Packages
Send your partner a care package while they’re away to show that you’re thinking of them. It could be as simple as a letter with photos. You should also send them away with some kind of object that reminds them of you, like a shirt — smell is a powerful sense that triggers memories. There are even collections of long distance relationship quotes and inspirational stories that you can use to infuse your relationship with love.


9. Do Things Together
The Internet is full of free games, goodies and communities for couples in long distance relationships. It may sounds strange, since you’re so far apart, but these days you can plan to have virtual dates to maintain closeness. Think about watching a movie together on Netflix or play a game online.


10. Visit
Visit one another at least every 6 weeks if you can — every situation is different. Skype and video chat can maintain things for so long — until someone can manage to integrate touch and smell into tech, in-person visits will have to do. A trip to visit your significant other every once in a while shows your partner that you still care, and that she/he's are still very important to you no matter how far away she/he is.

11. Spice It Up
Long distance relationships can go bland quickly, so be sure to spice things up when you can. When you visit, consider meeting halfway, so you can both get away from your daily grind. Don’t just go and visit each other though. Instead, try to create something uniquely you.


12. Be There
Not literally of course, but be there emotionally for your partner. This is a big part of what makes a long distance relationship work. Ask them how their day was, listen to their concerns, and just keep lines of communication open! You’re not in close proximity physically, so you have to make up for that. It’s important that your relationship continues to grow, not just maintains, despite the distance.



Monday, January 30, 2012

Five Danger Signs Of Long Distance Relationship You Should Watch Out For



Will it or will it not work ? Often, it's a dilemma faced by couple, deeply in love with each other, but lives miles apart. Undoubtedly, people in  long distance relationships, need to do more. In order, to keep everything alive and lasting.

However, like any other relationships, one should be wary of some signs that foretell the romance could be heading nowhere but downward.


Five Danger Signs That Your Long Distance Relationship Could Be In Danger :
 

1. Succumbing To Negative Comments

As if being miles away from each other isn’t enough, a long distance relationship is also prone to negative comments from people around you.

Things like, the relationship itself is not going anywhere, will always plague you or your loved one could be cheating.

Once you succumb to these, you will only begin to surrender fighting for the relationship and look for someone else who’s physically around.

Sometimes also, the reason why you’re buying all these notions is that you need an easy way out of the long distance romance.


2. Dwindling Enthusiasm

Keeping the fire burning constantly, sure could be tough in  a long distance relationship. But fortunately, for both of you, advances in technology. Particularly the internet, makes it somewhat easier.


However, if the availability of such technology. Still could not prevent you, from growing less and less enthusiastic of the relationship. By the time, you know it. There’s something wrong.

It is said that distance makes the heart grow fonder. But if your heart starts wandering around and longing for your loved ones, getting less and less. Then maybe, you’re no longer, passionate about the relationship.


3. Constant Suspicions Or Investigations 

Of course, being separated from each other. Makes the two of you, susceptible to temptations. And this is, where trust comes in, very importantly.

Frequent questioning and nagging with each other, about things like secretly dating someone else or not being a hundred percent true to each other. Can really get on your nerves – especially if none of it, is true.

Or it’s also possible you’re projecting your very own shortcomings, towards your loved ones from miles away. If distrust seems to grow more and more intense by the day. It’s time for a long heart to heart talk, to know the real score.



4. Going for A Temporary Replacement

Letting someone else into your life as a temporary replacement, for your loved one who’s not physically around is a huge mistake. Sometimes, this may be done unintentionally, but sometimes it’s done deliberately.

By doing this, even secretly, you’re breaking the trust, confidence, and potentially, the heart of your partner from afar.

If keeping yourself diverted at all costs, still makes you long for a physical replacement. Then you know, you’re in a shaky long distance relationship. Once you begin to notice someone else, nearby is catching your attention or fancy. Maybe, it’s time to re-evaluate things.


5. Frequent Misinterpretation Of Each Other

Couples who are next to each others, sometimes misinterpret one another’s thoughts, words or actions. What more than those, who are oceans apart?

Frequent misinterpretation of each other, can mean a lot of things. It can be days, months or years of being apart, make you less and less familiar with each other’s ways. It can be you’re beginning to have some form of distrust on your loved one.

Misinterpretations are, once in a while, pretty much normal. But if it happens every time, when you both get to communicate with one another. It can mean the two of you, begin to feel more like strangers instead.


If one or more of the five signs mentioned above, begin to show up. It’s best to talk about it, with your special someone right away.

Honesty and trusts are two important elements in a relationship, especially in the long distance kind. Through immediate dealing with problems, the relationship can be saved and perhaps, even strengthened all the more.



Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Secrets Of Chemical Romance






What is Chemical Romance? It’s a scientific approach to seduction that reveals how to unleash the natural chemicals in the body. Have you ever felt an instant connection with someone you just met? Have you ever fallen in love at first sight?


If yes, then you have experienced the powerful effects of chemical romance. When you are in a heightened state of arousal your body releases powerful chemicals that produce a state of euphoria.

The three most potent chemicals produced are oxytocin, it makes you feel intense desire for the person you’re with. Phenylethylamine, gives you a sense of total satisfaction and endorphins produces feelings of heightened pleasure.

Here are the six secrets to chemical romance—now is the time to unleash the sensuality of your lover.





Secret One: Use sensual scents—fill the room with the sweet smell of your lover’s favorite fragrance. Appealing to your lover’s sense of smell is a sure-fire way of stimulating the chemicals of romance.




Secret Two: Use erotic foods like chocolate that appeals to your lover’s sense of taste. Chocolate has an ingredient that releases endorphins in the brain causing a sense of pure pleasure. Feeding your lover pieces of chocolate is a powerful way of getting those chemicals flowing.

Secret Three: Use seductive lighting, appeal to your lover’s sense of sight. A romantic experience is greatly enhanced with the right lighting. A candlelit room or a room with the lights down-low conveys a warmth and softness that is perfect for romance.


Secret Four: Use romantic music, appeal to your lover’s sense of hearing. Cuddle with soft music playing in the background. Playing your lover’s favorite love song will greatly enhance the romantic mood.



Secret Five: Intimate conversation is vital to chemical romance. Stimulate your lover with mental imagery. Whisper words of love between sensual kisses. This is a powerful way to instantly set romantic feelings ablaze.
 

Secret Six: Use silk fabrics, appeal to your lover’s sense of touch. Moments of passion are enhanced by the feel of silk sheets caressing your skin—the erotic sensations are almost orgasmic.

The six secrets to unleashing the chemicals of romance is a powerful approach that when used correctly, can ignite the flames of intense passion and desire in your lover.






10 Things Never To Say To A Guy





1. WHEN WILL I SEE YOU AGAIN?
You’ll see him when you see him. If he wants to see you again, he’ll call. If not, next. You don’t have time for anyone that doesn’t have time for you.


2. I LOVE YOU (FIRST)
You’re saying it in the hopes that he’ll say it back, but what if he doesn’t? You’ll be devastated and probably feel foolish. Saying "I love you" is not going to speed things up if he’s not ready to say it back. So just cool it, and let him be the first to say it when he’s ready.

3. WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL?
There’s only one answer to this question: Because he didn’t want to!!! What you’re really asking is, "Why didn’t you want to call me?" Who knows!! There could be a lot of reasons, but you shouldn’t be sitting around wondering why. You should be out dating lots of different guys and not worrying about ONE guy. Don’t be so quick to put all your eggs into one basket, because if they break, it’s a big mess!

4. WHERE IS THIS GOING?
Nowhere fast if that’s your attitude. Guys want someone fun and easy to be with, not someone that’s constantly worrying about the future. His actions or non-actions will tell you where it’s going. If it’s going somewhere, you’ll know it. If it’s not, you’ll know it too.

5. WHERE WERE YOU?
If he wanted you to know where he was, he’d tell you. What you’re really asking is, "Where you with another female that you like better than me?" Your insecurity is showing, my dear. If anything, he should be wondering where you were.

6. WE NEED TO TALK.
This is the equivalent of, "Go to the principal’s office". Guys know it’s not going to be a fun conversation, so they’re already on the defense. If you need to discuss something, just casually bring it up when the both of you are relaxed. Don’t try to talk to him when he’s tired, stressed or trying to watch tv!

7. I’M PREGNANT.
In 2005, with all the birth control choices available, there is no excuse for becoming pregnant, unless you want to be. You should be using something and he should use a condom, every time..

8. I DON’T TRUST YOU.
What you’re actually saying is, "You need to step up your game, because I can see you’re up to something." If he is up to something, he’ll just become even sneakier. Better to think smart and act dumb-it’ll be easier to get the evidence you need to confirm your suspicions.

9. DID YOU SLEEP WITH HER?
As long as he’s not sleeping with her now, who cares? The past is gone. Don’t torture yourself (and him) with these thoughts. In this case, ignorance really is bliss.

10. I HATE YOU!
Even if you do, it’s totally uncalled for and un-lady like. If there’s an issue, be mature enough to discuss it when you’re calm. If he’s breaking up with you, reacting with anger may make you feel better temporarily, but it’s best to remain calm and act unfazed. He’ll wonder why you’re so cool about it and that may make him re-think his decision. Always be pleasant during a break up. Do you want to be known as the girl that goes psycho if someone breaks up with her?? I didn’t think so.




Monday, January 16, 2012

8 Red Flags To Look For In Dating Relationships







 
When starting a new relationship, many women tend to overlook some behaviors in their new partner that do not bode well for the future. Then, down the road, comes the exclamation ‘If I had only known...’.
 
One of the main factors is that he comes on very strong in the beginning of your relationship - sweeps you off your feet - and wants an exclusive relationship too quickly. Many women feel flattered at the intensity of the man’s seeming need for an immediate connection and consequently overlook the inappropriateness of it.
 
This should not be confused with ‘love at first sight’ where one or both parties feel an instant connection - without any of the aforementioned behaviors.*
 
Here are some ‘Red Flags’ to watch out for, in a new partner. You can always trace back unpleasant and also dangerous character traits to the very start of the relationship.
 
  1. He may openly flirt with other women and then accuse you of being jealous when you object.
  2.  
  3. He gets angry and loses his temper over trivialities. Stays angry for a long time and attempts to blame all arguments on you. May hits walls, when angry.
  4.  
  5. He does not want to spend time with your friends or family and insists you socialize with his people.
  6.  
  7. He makes decisions about where to go with little or no input from you.
  8.  
  9. He belittles your opinion when the two of you are alone and may call you names.
  10.  
  11. He makes disparaging remarks about you in front of others and may talk about you as if you were not there.
  12.  
  13. He will not acknowledge your areas of expertise and may put down what you do in the workplace - ignore any of your accomplishments.
  14.  
  15. He may be rough during love-making and make you engage in acts you do not like.
 
There are many other factors that could be listed - but if the man in your life begins displaying the above qualities - realize it will not get better, only worse. He will likely be unwilling to discuss his emotions openly and feel that women are the inferior sex.
 
If this describes your man, run - do not walk - out of his life. The next step will likely be physical abuse.




6 Mistakes You Should Avoid In Making A Relationship Work


Making a relationship work is something everybody would like to do. But there are some things we need to avoid, if we want to have a happy relationship.

 
Avoid thinking about separation or divorce as an Immediate option

When you enter a serious relationship, you must keep in mind the thought that separation, or divorce, is not an option. This kind of mindset allows you as a couple to see solutions to relationships boiling points, that every couple experiences, which would have otherwise been overlooked simply because one eye was too busy examining exit strategies.

Communication is the keyword in relationships, and this is the thing that helped most couples spend their whole life together.




Avoid stopping to communicate

Lack of communication is the number one reason even good relationships fail. In communication you need to listen to your partner’s needs. It’s very easy to forget how to listen. But it is also the most important thing in a successful relationships. Try to here the needs and just to be there for him or her without putting yourself in the picture. It is very important to listen as well as say what’s on your heart without blaming your partner.




Avoid giving up your time together

 Don’t give up dating even after years into the relationship. The time that you have just for yourself is essential for a good relationship. Time to do things that you like together without kids or work.It is very important to have shared interests for the two of you ,things that you both like to do. The time together let you keep building your intimacy and your good communication, even if you had a tough week.




Avoid of trying to change your partner

 In any person there are things we like and things we don’t. Especially in our partner. The funny thing is that the thing we liked in our partner in the beginning, is what we now hate the most… try to focus on the qualities of your partner, and to compliment him or her on the things that you feel they put an effort in. When the atmosphere is good, even the hard things seems better.

  

 Avoid Fantasy

 "There is no such thing as a perfect relationship, there are only perfect moments". You need to have realistic expectations from your partner and from your relationship. Don’t expect that the crazy passion you had in the beginning of your relationship will last forever. A long-term relationship has ups and downs, it’s not always fun and exciting. To make a relationship work, you need to work on it. As you take care of your car, your health, your garden, you need to take care of your relationship.
Avoid thinking that every problem can be solved  
 Every couple has issues they can not agree upon. Sometime the best idea is to agree to disagree. Sometimes talking about these specific issues just get you nowhere, and you both know it. If you want to make your relationship work, you need to have legitimate areas of disagreement. There is no such thing a partner that agrees with you on everything. The trick is how to work through issues that you don’t agree upon.


No good relationships just happen naturally. It takes hard work just like, everything else in life. And above all, making a relationship work- takes time and a lot of patience.




12 Signs That You Should End Your Relationship




Most couples have rough patches. Many are oblivious, to the signs pointing to trouble in the relationship.

If you are having a rough time in your relationship and can't decide IF IT'S OVER.






                      Here are some telltale signs that you may need to move on ...


1.) You DON'T WANT TO SPEND TIME with your partner and often find yourself looking for EXCUSES to avoid spending time with one another.

2.) You find yourself REMINISCING about the PAST and EMOTION, you used to feel. The intensity of your emotion will DISSIPATE some, once you have PAST THE HONEYMOON stage.

This means that you NO LONGER have the FEELING towards your partner, that you used to. If you look deep inside and you're HONEST WITH YOURSELF. You will know, when the LOVE IS GONE.

3.)You have to COMPROMISE YOUR BELIEFS, VALUES, and HAPPINESS. In order to make your partner's happy or to AVOID DISPUTES with them.

4.) You NO LONGER find your partner ATTRACTIVE or you may have CHANGE YOUR APPEARANCE drastically hoping to be attractive to your partner.

5.) You are NOT ALLOWED to have closed friends or close relationship with your family. Your partner may be POSSESSIVE and get JEALOUS, when you try to pursue any relationship. Besides the one, you have with them.

6.) You are ENGAGING in repetitive QUARELLS/FIGHTS that serve no purpose.

7.) You NO LONGER want your partner to KISS you. You may try, to AVOID PHYSICAL CONTACT all together.

8.) You LOOK FORWARD to the the times you are APART and DREAD the times when you are together.

9.) You DON'T WANT to try FIND SOLUTION for a problem. You just DON'T CARE ANYMORE.

10.) You DON'T COMMUNICATE except when you absolutely HAVE TO.

11.) You can NO LONGER VISUALIZE yourself, spending the rest of your life with your partner. You can ONLY SEE, spending the rest of your life WITHOUT THEM.

12.) You DON'T HAVE the same long-term GOALS.

Deciding to end a relationship, should be taken very seriously. It should not be done on a whim. It also takes a lot of thought.

Most importantly, a relationship should bring you joy and fulfil your needs. Relationship are supposed to add to the quality of your life, not take away from it ...







The Top 5 Things That Men Do to Ruin Their Relationship





A good woman is hard to find, so when you find one. Don't ruin your chances with her by making any one of this mistakes. Remember, that a desirable woman has probably dated a lot of men and most probably know what is going on.

So when you make one of those mistakes. They DISAPPEAR on you before, you ever realize that you have done something WRONG !!!



1.) You SHARE your feeling with a woman TOO EARLY.

- Once you tell a woman that you LOVE her. You have LOSE the MYSTERY, the SPARK and the EXCITEMENT of the chase.

You have to remain CASUAL in the early stages of dating.

- You should only share your feelings once you both have gotten to know each others well. You also have to understand that you CAN'T CONVINCE someone to FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU. When you fall in love, it happens outside of your conscious mind. Remember, that we don't choose who we fall in love with.

2.) Moving much TOO QUICKLY.

- Its normal to wonder how YOUR FUTURE with each other will TURN OUT. But if you start TALKING ABOUT MARRIAGE after only one month of dating. YOU will most likely send that woman RUNNING FOR THE DOOR.

- Just because you REALLY LIKE that one woman, doesn't mean that you should RUSH INTO anything faster than they naturally progress.

- Think about your FRIENDSHIPS, the progress of friendships that naturally progress. It is VERY RARE that you find someone who wants to become BEST BUDDIES overnight.

- The BEST RULE you can follow is ' SLOWER THE BETTER. '

3.) You are TOO AVAILABLE.

- You may think that if you say YOU'RE BUSY. You're playing a MIND GAME or being MANIPULATIVE. The TRUTH is, we always try TO ACT a certain way, in order TO ACHIEVE a certain outcome. We are all manipulative at some point. The POINT is to NOT ALLOW any manipulation HURT your partner.

- The BEST WAY to start a HEALTHY relationship is NOT TO make your new girlfriend the CENTRE OF YOUR LIFE. If she DOES NOT UNDERSTAND that you have a life of your own.

" SHE IS NOT FOR YOU. "

- You have TO BE who you were BEFORE you met this woman. You should continue BEING YOURSELF and NOT TRICK her into thinking you're something that YOU'RE NOT.

4.) Be YOURSELF, stop looking for her approval.

- We, as women LOVE man who is CONFIDENT and has STRONG SENSE of SELF-WORTH. Men often try TO GUESS at how we want them TO ACT and try TO ACCOMODATE.

- This leave NO ROOM for your OWN PERSONALITY to shine. You have to be COMFORTABLE being yourself. You have to show that YOU'RE NOT AFRAID of being yourself. This is VERY ATTRACTIVE to women.

5.) Buying ways TOO MANY GIFTS.

- When you have only know a woman for a few weeks and have been showering her with EXPENSIVE GIFTS. You have RUINED any chance of a REAL relationship.

- Expensive gifts are for couples that are in a LONG-TERM relationship. If you BUY them TOO EARLY, it can have a NEGATIVE EFFECT on your relationship.

Those are the top five mistakes that men make when they are dating a woman. If you can avoid these mistakes, you will increase your chances of succeeding in your relationship.



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